Attracting The Same Unwanted Experience

I have written you before and your answer helped me immensely a couple of years ago. It was actually life changing and I ended up letting go of a relationship with a boyfriend that was not working and attracting my current husband with your advice. However, I need some advice again.


My ex-husband treated me poorly. I was married to him for 14 years. He said I was annoying, insulted me, said he regretted marrying me and avoided coming home from work. My current husband who I attracted with LOA is a great life partner. He is kind and has a good heart and I am grateful for him. However, I have lately been attracting the exact same previous experience that I had with my ex-husband. It is very strange as I don’t know how I attracted this. I do not dwell on my ex-husband or how he treated me. I am happy to have moved on from that part of my life. My current husband has recently been saying the same things: I was annoying, he insulted me, he regretted marrying me, and he once avoided coming home from work.

It’s almost as if I can separate this unwanted experience from who my husband is as a person. I don’t think this is part of his character and I am simply attracting this experience. The similarity between the two experiences is uncanny. My husband has told me he’s very sorry, he loves me and he wants to be with me.

My question is that I am unaware of how I have attracted this unwanted experience, as I've said, I don’t really think about my ex very much at all. I don’t re-live old feelings. How do I figure out how I have been attracting this and how do I stop from continuing to attract it?

Law-of-Attraction-Guide Reply

Is every little circumstance that we align to, caused by a way we think and feel?

Although the Law of Attraction describes how events enter our lives as experiences that match the way we vibrate, it cannot however, be the reason that we experience everything single thing that happens to us.

When we think and feel, the pattern of thought and emotions that we develop tends to be in reaction to what we have experienced. If the experience was positive, our thoughts and emotions will tend to be of happiness and pleasure, but if the experience was negative, our thoughts and emotions will tend to be of disappointment, fear and worry.

And the longer we held on to these emotions, the more that we would make them a part of us, and the stronger the attraction power we would have to re-align more experiences that matched our way of thinking.

If the experience had caused us to feel happiness and pleasure, and we continued to carry these happy pleasurable thoughts than these will become a part of our vibration, so that the Law of Attraction would align us to new experiences that helped us to think and feel this way.

But if the experience had caused us to feel disappointment, fear and worry, and we continued to carry these fearful and worrisome thoughts than these will become a part of our vibration, so that the Law of Attraction would align us to new experiences that helped us to think and feel this way.

You have seen this process in your relationships, as your ex-husband treated you poorly, telling you that you were annoying, insulted you, regretted marrying you and avoided coming home from work, and this experience obviously left you with thoughts and feelings that affected you powerfully, and it wasn't until you focused your thought in another way that you were able to attract a great life partner.

But I am sure that the relationship with your ex-husband didn't start like this, I am sure that there was a mutual attraction that you first had towards each other, and I am sure that the change in character that he showed you did not happen overnight.

This leads me to the question I first posed, “is every little circumstance that we align to, caused by a way we think and feel?”

In many relationships, in the early stages of growth we are often looking for the positive aspects of our new partners, as we are in a search for the one. We look out for the things we like, appreciate and get excited about, and the more we add these positive things to our thoughts and emotions, the more we align to them, and the more we align to them, the more we experience them, and as we think of all the best things this relationship is offering, if they are able, our partners join us in a mutual manifestation in which all thought, and all feelings are matched by the whole improving experience.

But as this relationship grows, as the search for the one comes to an end and we become comfortable with our new relationship, and we are no longer looking for likeable, exciting behaviour, as we have found security, as the strong, powerful thoughts and emotions are toned down, the odd bit of behaviour can creep into our relationships that may not please us.

It is not that we have attracted these unpleasing thing, it’s just that we have wound down our high, attractive vibration of fun and excitement, allowing random manifestations to enter our experiences so that we can choose new realities we want to experience.

This is called the contrast, and it is only because of this contrast that we can create the experiences we would like.

To try to explain this, if we think about any experience, general they are made up of 2 parts. The parts you like, and the parts you do not like, and without these 2 parts, you could not choose what you would prefer.

For example, do you prefer to be hot or cold? Most people would say hot, yet without cold, hot could not exist.

Do you prefer light or dark? Most people would say light, yet without darkness, light could not exist.

Would you prefer a happy relationship or a sad one? Most people would say happy, yet without the existence of sadness, happiness could not exist.

As every experience is made up of 2 parts, you cannot condemn the unwanted part, because without it a preference could not be born.

If it is possible for experiences to enter our realities as an offer of contrast, and this new experience causes us to think and feel, it will be our thoughts and feelings about this experience that will become the attractive force we hold over this contrast.

For example, you may be financially secure and not think too much about abundance or lack when it came to money, yet out of the blue you received an unexpected bill which dented your savings. Now this experience has 2 parts, the part you like, that you had enough money to pay the bill, and the part you did not like, that you had received something unexpected that dented your savings.

It will depend on your reaction to this experience that will determine what you align to.

You could also think and feel about the dent that your savings took, how you now had less money, and how unjust the world is that your security can be so easily threatened.

Or you could be thankful that, even when a rare unexpended bill comes your way, you always have more than enough money to pay, and your savings always quickly recover, and usually when you spend money more money is attracted to you.

In reaction to this bill, if you thought that your financial stability was threatened, and this made you feel worried and insecure, in time you would attract more unexpected bills to match the insecure vibration you were holding, which if left unaddressed would lead you to more and more financial problems.

On the other hand, if you saw this bill as an expression of abundance, and showed gratitude for having more than enough, knowing that more inevitable leads to more, then you would align to an experience in which there were no financial issues.

If we look at your experience, you are happy and have a great life partner, yet out of the blue he has started to treat you differently, this is not something that you necessarily attracted, this could be a random experience that you had given no thought to. But it is how you react to this experience that will determine your attraction point.

If you do not like this experience, and you worry about this relationship fearing that it may turn in the way your marriage had, then undoubtedly your partner will offer you more unlikeable experience so that you can express more fear and worry.

Or if you were grateful for this offering, knowing that your relationship and love were far stronger, and you used this as an reminder for what your life was like, knowing that is now far better, then you will start to attract more love and a stronger unity.

I guess my advice is this…..

When you experience something that you do not like, use it to define what you do like and think in alignment to the likable, not the unlikeable.

For a more structured approach try my Unlock The Power WorkBook, which takes you through a step-by-step process to do this, and continues by helping you to build positive intentions through seemingly negative experiences.

With Gratitude

John Peace
Law-of-Attraction-Guide.com

30-Days To Raise Your Vibration
The Unlock The Power WorkBook


P.S. Follow Me On FaceBook
CLICK HERE to join Our Law of Attraction Facebook Community

Use This Link If You Have A Law of Attraction Question

Click here to post comments

Return to Law of Attraction Relationship Advice.






Copyright 2007-2016 Law-of-Attraction-Guide.com

Members Log in



Promote Your Page Too

First Day Of The Rest Of Your Life