Fell In Love After Marriage

by Geetanjali
(India)

I have been married for 3.5 years now... I married because I thought that this guy would care for me... but things changed after marriage and I had very tough times...


I met this guy in my office 1.5 years ago who is my boss. We liked each other the first day we met and if I look back, both of us cannot deny that we felt something between us. He is married too. After around 8 months... we started going around.. When we started it was just that we knew we have feelings for each other and wanted to spend time with each other because it made us feel good.

As time went by we grew more serious in the relationship and started thinking of marriage. His wife found out about us and the first time he told her that everything was over. After the second time, she started to understand that he is in love with me. My husband on the other hand started realizing my value and started loving me the way I could have never imagined.

Now, the problem is that I am clear I want to spend my life with the guy I am in love. But he doesn't seem to get the courage to get out of his marriage because he doesn’t know how will his current wife survive... He is also affected by what his family will have to say. Especially his mom who would not be able to digest this well...

He is confused and has lost faith in the future of our relationship. I on the other hand believe that if we want to be together everything will work out. I don't want to force things on him and want him to take the decision of getting us together on his own. I want him to know that I am with him and have faith that we will do it.

What do I do?

Law-of-Attraction-Guide Reply

As your question demonstrates so clearly, you cannot change your situations, and your thoughts and feelings, by changing conditions. In other words, you cannot go from a place of unhappiness by attempting to physically change your reality.

You say, “I married because I thought that this guy would care for me... but things changed after marriage and I had very tough times”. You were in need of caring, so much so, that you tried to change the condition of not being married, to find the caring you needed, and ended up without the care.

And then, because of the lack of companionship, you sought to fill this feeling of lack by finding a new relationship, and all that has done is worsen the feeling of lack within you.

The Law of Attraction works at all times, when you feel in need of something, and you take action to full fill that need, you end up attracting situations that cause you to feel more need.

This is because your thoughts and feelings of that need, become an emotional part of you, become your vibration, and the Law of Attraction, which is in constant cooperation to your vibration, will provide you with every situation and circumstance to match it.

You cannot move from an emotion, or a vibration of need, to a situation of satisfaction through taking physical action. That defies law..

So how do you find that satisfaction from that needy place?

Feeling needy or feeling any negative emotion, is really a signal to you that you are out of vibration with who you really are.

Your inner self knows your desires, and once your desires are met, you know that your vibration will be one of joy and happiness, and so any negative emotion is only an offering of a signal to yourself, of how far away you are from vibrating with that joy.

But because all conditions are put in place with the Law of Attraction, and because the Law of Attraction cooperates with your vibration, to get what you want, you first have to change your vibration.

You say that you are clear of what you want, but to me it sounds that you have become clear about what will make you happy, and what concerns me is this….

If you believe that you will be unhappy, unless you are with this guy, and you cannot see a way that he will overcome his personal obstacles to be with you, and therefore you are going to suffer from the lack of this relationship. What you are likely to attract is suffering and lack, whatever the outcome.

You have to accept that it is not within your power to alter any conditions to make you happy, it also not possible to try to alter any behaviour to make you happy.

By focusing on other peoples need to change so that you can be happy, will only manifest more things you want to change.

The only power that you have to be happy, comes from is within, and once you start to consciously change your thoughts and feelings, and change your vibration, you will only then start to see the manifestation of your desires.

You need to become happy and contented with where you are now, before you can start to travel in the direction of where you want to be.

How can you become happy and contented now, when there is little to be happy and contented with?

By finding each happy and contented thing about your life, and offering these thoughts, whenever any negative thoughts about where you are now, come to mind.

But would I stop there?

Not at all, I would find every positive aspect, of every person I spent time with, and of every experience that became a part of my reality. I would spent time each day contemplating these positive thoughts, and whenever I offered a moan, a complaint, a nag, a dig, or any negative emotion, I would recall these positive thoughts.

If you want change in your life, you first have to accept where you are, you need to find the happiness of here, before you can find the happiness of over there.

And the great thing is this. If you start to offer a happy and contented vibration now, the path to where you want to be, becomes clear, unhindered, and simple to find.


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Comments for Fell In Love After Marriage

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Mar 06, 2012
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don't search for happiness,it is right with u.
by: Anonymous

u wrote that, your spouse understood your situation and cooperated with you (none of the men will do this) ,that itself shows that he cares for you and he loves you.so start seeing him in a positive way.you will find everything is ok.

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