Law of Attraction And Abrupt Breakup

by Beth
(Virginia Beach, VA)

Thank you for responding to my previous questions titled, "Abrupt Breakup". You asked if my partner and I were in vibrational alignment. I really thought we were.


We had lots of fun, and he was extremely playful and affectionate all the time. He literally went from saying he loved me one day, to packing his bags and sneaking out the next. I don't see how someone can love someone then just abruptly walk out.

I realize we cannot create in another's existence, but if I am focusing on the positive aspects of our ended relationship, is that moving him back closer to me and a reconciliation? Or......am I creating the aspects I want of an entirely new partner?

So, focusing on the positive aspects of him won't help bring him back to me? I just need to let this one go? Or do I write him a letter telling him how I feel in an attempt to reach out to him?

I just don't know if my energy is being focused on trying to attract him back to me, or trying to attract a new love to me based on the criteria I am adding to my list.

Thank you again for your previous response. Any additional info you could give me about attracting an ex back into my life and if that is even possible would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you again.

Law-of-Attraction-Guide Reply

If you wish to be in a meaningful relationship, be in a meaningful relationship in mind.

If you wish to share romance, share romance in mind.

If you wish to be in love, be in love in mind.

These are the vibrations that will bring you to your desired results. With whom, where and when, I cannot answer, but if this is what you vibrate, this is what you shall experience.

But if you keep thinking about being with your ex, your undoubted vibration will be without these things, as you are without them now. And then your undoubted experience will not be one you desire.

I cannot tell you what you need to do, it is to your heart, your soul and your intuition that you must trust, for there lies the answer.

You say in your question, “He literally went from saying he loved me one day, to packing his bags and sneaking out the next. I don't see how someone can love someone then just abruptly walk out.”

Well I have to agree with you, how could someone who says he loves you, just abruptly walk out?

Personally, I think it would be a good idea to write to him, expressing your feelings and desires, and I would really be careful to do that without apportioning any blame for what has happened.

I also believe that you have to be prepared to let him go, after all, if you truly love this guy, you’re biggest desire must be that he finds happiness on his terms, not yours.

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Unexpected Breakup

I understand that if we focus on our appreciation of things, then they will continue to grow and prosper. I thought I had found my soul mate. I was and still am, madly in love with him.

We were together for a year and a half and lived together for six months. I was only focusing on the positive. However, I addressed a few things that were troubling me with how he wasn't helping enough with household responsibilities, and he abruptly packed his things and left.

I was completely blindsided. I thought we were happy and always focused on what we had together, never what we were lacking.

He very coldly walked out on me and hasn't spoken to me in weeks. He had told me he loved me and that I was the one he wanted to spend his life with. I am still confused as to why he walked out so abruptly when I was focusing only on how happy we were together.

My question is, if I was only focusing on how happy I was with him, and positive things, how did I attract such a devastating end result?

Law-of-Attraction-Guide Reply

It’s never easy to answer a question like this, as it is very difficult for someone who has seemingly done all the right things, to understand why they are not seeing the results they anticipated.

There are also many ways to look at this, and many angles to take, but without knowing the full story, I don’t know that I will be able to help you, but I shall just do the best I can.

Were you and your partner a vibrational match?

This is something many people get confused with. They seem to concentrate on being a vibrational match to each other, so that everything in their relationships will be perfect.

However, trying to adjust our vibration to match our partners, is stepping into the realm of things beyond our control. The matching of vibration is down to the Law of Attraction, and we only need concern ourselves with being a vibration match to ourselves.

When you are in a vibrational match to yourself, the best of everything that is a vibrational match to you, will come to you.

Invariably when I get questions about relationships, people ask, “how can I get my partner to be more like this, so I can feel better about our relationship?”

The best answer I can give to this is, You Can’t...

It’s not a partner’s job to be like anything, so that someone can start to feel better about anything. However it is your job to tune in to the parts of your partner that you most want to experience, so that this vibrational match to your ‘wants’ will be manifested.

What often happens as a relationship grows, is this;

In the beginning we spent more time looking for the things we like in our new partner, and with dreams of, “Is this the one,” our vibration is matched to the best of what this new relationship brings.

As time goes by and the relationship develops, we start to notice the things we don’t like about our partner, we notice, we give it attention, we offer it vibration, and low and behold, we see these dislikes manifest more and more.

So the trick is, is to concentrate on the things that you like about your partner, offer those experiences vibration, so that more of those experiences will be manifested.

There is a great clip in the film The Secret which explains this very well, it goes something like this.....

“Sometimes people will say, ‘those people at work are so negative,’ or ‘the man I live with is so angry,’ or ‘my children are so worrisome to me,’ and we say, ‘you must orient yourself to the best part of those people who surround you.’

‘We encourage that you get a notebook and you make a list of the positive aspects of the people you spend a lot of time with.’

There could be someone that you have a terrible experience with, a terrible relationship with. And in the privacy of your own mind, and with quite a bit of work we will admit, as you focus on things that you like most, those people will become that mostly to you.

And even though you cannot create in their reality, if they are in a mood, or an attitude that doesn’t match the mood and attitude that you have about them, they’ll zig, while you zag.

Law of Attraction will not put you in the same space together, your frequencies don’t match up.

If you knew your potential to feel good, you would ask no one to be different, so that you can feel good. You would free yourself of all that cumbersome impossibility, of needing to control the world, or control your mate, or control your child.

You are the only one who creates your reality, for no one else can think for you, no one else can do it, it is only you, every bit of it you”


You also say in your question that, “I thought I had found my soul mate. I was and still am, madly in love with him.”

Here is a great video from Abraham-Hicks on Soul Mates, which may help you.

Abraham-Hicks On Relationships



I would recommend that you read John Gray’s book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex, or his new book Why Mars and Venus Collide

I certainly don’t think that this relationship is over, as you said, “He had told me he loved me and that I was the one he wanted to spend his life with.” I just think it needs some fixing.

And to fix a relationship you first have to communicate, you have to talk, but more importantly, you have to listen

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