Law of Attraction Relationship Help
(Mumbai, India )
I have been desperately looking for someone to help me with the Law of Attraction, and how to apply it. So I know that it works.
I love this one guy, we have been together for almost 2 years. I had made it clear to him at the start of the relationship that I may not marry him as he is from another religion and my mother would not approve. However we grew closer by the day and began loving each other a lot.
His mother had asked him if there is anything happening between us, and he had told her that he would tell her if anything does happen. My mother kept asking me, however she was very comfortable with him, and I also told her that I would not marry against her wishes.
In the interim I received a marriage proposal and so did he. But nothing came out of it and we were still close to each other until this March.
In the first week of March, his mother had arranged for him to meet a girl for marriage, which he did, as it was arranged at a cousin’s wedding and he didn’t have a choice. I didn’t pay much attention to this, as I was going through a crisis at work.
That week he was asked to call the girl and when he spoke to me, I told him that if your mother is asking you to, maybe you should, (this I now know was a big mistake.. I should have stopped him then, but not once did I think that his mother fully commit to a marriage in 2 days). Before we knew it, on the 14th of March his mother committed to the girls' parents that her son will marry their daughter.
Just at that time I had told him that I would marry him, and because of issues with work, I had just been waiting for the right time to tell him.
He told his mother that he wanted to marry me and not that girl, but his mother started throwing tantrums and asked him to choose his family or me, and that he is fighting with his family cos of me.
She wants to fix the marriage for June, and nothing that he says is helping the situation. His mother is acting in a stubborn manner and unwilling to listen, and as she is very important to him, he would never want to hurt her.
As the situation stands, my mother is willing for the marriage as she is worried about my happiness.. His mother is obstinate.
He loves me, wants to marry me and in our minds we are already committed to each other. It’s just that can’t call each other husband/wife as we are not married officially. We know that we are meant for each other and we complete each other.
I convinced him that since whatever we are doing is not working out, maybe we should just use the Law of Attraction, as this is the only way things can work out.
I know you would say that maybe the universe has someone better lined up for you... however we both want to be with each other, its just because of his mother that we are unable to be together.
I don’t know what to do. Time is limited as she is fixing things so fast and wants the marriage to happen in June. He told that girl that he likes someone else, however her retort was, I will still marry you but you forget about her.
John, I love him, he loves me and he wants to marry no one but me. But until yesterday he thought of his situation as helpless.
I explained to him that all he has to do is feel and focus his energies on marrying me, not think about anyone else or anything else, just believe, and also believe that his mother will totally love me and be happy with him marrying me.
I want to spend my life with him. He wants to spend his life with me.
The easiest option for him is to tell his mother that, "he is not marrying anyone else", however as she lives alone in another city, and she is suffering from chronic depression, he cannot do this...
I have cried a lot and prayed a lot since the 13th of March, and I know that this won’t help, and I have to be happy for everything to work according to the Law... Law-of-Attraction-Guide Reply
The Law of Attraction is not something we do, or don’t do. It is a Law that matches our focused thought to an experience, and it is at work for all people, at all times.
The advantage you have in knowing about the Law of Attraction, is that you can consciously choose the focus you have, and as a result, create the reality you wish to experience.
In understanding that the Law of Attraction aligns a reality to our experience depending on our
focused thoughts and feelings, it is easy to see that there is absolutely no way that you can change the reality of another, by changing the way you think and feel. That would defy Law.
In other words, your happiness depends on your focus, your boyfriend’s happiness depends on his focus, and in very much the same way, your boyfriend’s mother’s happiness, depends on her focus.
What this knowledge does is release you, and indeed your boyfriend, from choosing his reality based on the thoughts and feelings of other’s. Because, as much as he cannot make his mother happy by changing the way he thinks and feels, neither can he change his reality and achieve the same result.
Your boyfriend’s mother’s happiness depends on her focus, and has nothing to do with the thoughts or feelings of your boyfriend, nor does it have anything to do with the way he chooses to be happy.
There is a great passage in Abraham-Hicks
book, Ask & It Is Given
, which explains this perfectly.“No one else needs you to be or do things in order for them to be fulfilled - for all of them have the same access to the Stream of Well-Being that you do. Often, others (who do not understand that they have access to the Stream) suffer in their inability to hold themselves in a place of feeling good, and ask you to behave in a way that they believe will make them feel better. But not only do they hold you in a place of discomfort as they try to make you responsible for their joy, they hold themselves in a place of bandage as well. For they cannot control the way any other behaves, and if that control is necessary for their happiness, then they truly are in trouble.”
You see, your boyfriend will do himself, his mother or you for that matter, no favors in choosing his reality based upon what will make the most people happy, in fact, his only choice can only be, a decision based upon his own happiness.
To quote Abraham-Hicks
again…“The greatest gift that you could ever give to another is your own happiness, for when you are in a state of joy, happiness, or appreciation, you are fully connected to the Stream of pure, positive Source Energy that is truly who you are. And when you are in that state of connection, anything or anyone that you are holding as your object of attention benefits from your attention.”
Your boyfriend will not go against his mother because of her depression, but he needs to understand that his mothers depression comes from her past focused thoughts and feelings, and no attempt that she tries to make to manipulate her reality will ever change this experience for her, until she changes her focus.
As you have stated, you have, “explained to him that all he has to do is feel and focus his energies on marrying me, not think about anyone else or anything else, just believe.” All good advice, but the question remains, what does your boyfriend intend to do? And can he make this difficult decision?
You see, no one ever suggested that in doing, being and having the things we want, that this reality would ever come with, not doing, not being and not having the things we do not want. In fact, quite the opposite, as in choosing what we want we always have to choose what we do not want.
In fact, the danger comes in not choosing, as in not choosing what we want we inevitably choose what we do not want. So a decision always needs to be made.
And the sooner your boyfriend realizes that in choosing what he wants to experience, can never create a reality for someone else to feel bad, the sooner he chooses to be who he really is.
Our reality is our reality, and let no one ever persuade us to choose unhappiness over happiness, it will not serve us and it certainly will not serve them.
Never accept that your experience is anything but under your control, for whatever you choose to do, or not to do, if you allow it, your reality will always be a perfect reflection of your thoughts and feelings.
In fact, your thoughts and feelings is all you have, and to whatever you focus them, a perfect match shall always be found.
If you wish to experience a reality of love and companionship, have that in mind. Be the love and companionship you most want to experience, and to the extent of that focus, a matching reality shall always be found.
Indeed, use your knowledge to help your boyfriend decide, but whatever his decision, do not let that decision define you. Your happiness comes from within, and you do not need to rely on others to behave in a certain way, in order for you to be happy.
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