Use LOA To Attract The Perfect Person I’ve Already Met

by Lilly

I met the man whom I believe is my soul mate. The problem was we were both married with kids when we met. We were at a month-and-a-half-long training for our career field and during that time we began a romantic relationship. We love each other and we both felt that we should have married each other instead of the partners we were with but that we arrived too late in each other’s lives.

I have used the LOA since a very young age without even realizing it. I have always been a dreamer, a goal-oriented, successful person. I remember makings statements like “I always get what I want (in regards to success)” as young as 15. I even stated I wanted to marry a U.S. Air Force Member of a specific ethnic descent from California. I repeated this on several occasions for about a year not knowing anything about the LOA and I married someone who fit that description exactly. Unfortunately I made no other requirements other than those and he was not a good husband and was abusive. I read the Secret and began purposefully using the LOA and recently received a tax-free $75,000 annual pay increase at my job while still doing the same job and in the same position. It’s incredible! This is to say that I don’t doubt the LOA, I do have questions on how to correctly use it in regards to my soul mate. I feel as though I have everything I could possibly want in life. I live overseas, I travel internationally 3-4 times a year, I have a great job in a field I love with generous vacation time, I have healthy children. I feel as though the only thing I’m missing is a life of shared experiences with my soul mate.

I met him two years ago and although we live in different countries we have made trips to see each other. There was one point when we tried to see each other for the first time since first meeting and nothing worked out. We had planned a trip to meet each other and we both had to cancel it and I was very upset. I asked the universe to show me why on Earth I would have been given the opportunity to meet my soul mate and then not be able to be with him and not be able to see him. A few days later I realized that the pain I felt for not being with him felt very similar to the pain I felt when I lost both of my parents at a young age to cancer. I remembered that I kept a journal where I wrote down all my sad thoughts about loosing my parents. I had, in college, taken a creative writing class and the professor noted that the theme of loosing, particularly my mother, was a trend in all my writings. I kept this journal to use for future things I might write and I thought that writing them in the journal was therapeutic and somehow got the sad thoughts “out of me.” I realize now that I was giving them power. I took the book and burned all the pages where I had written sad things and began to write things I was grateful for in the remaining pages. When I did this I was on the other side of the world from my soul mate. Within two weeks time I was spending a weekend with him in a city where we, by pure whims of destiny, were both able to travel to at the last minute. It worked out so perfect we literally could not have planned it that well ourselves.

We actually nearly crossed paths several times in our lives before getting married or, at least, before having kids. Every time we have a conversation we find out another occasion where we nearly met at a more opportune time. We almost attended college in the same city (outside of my home country). We have passed through the same cities at the exact same times even both spending a month at the same time in a very small village in Europe and never meeting when it was more opportune. I learned to speak the language that is his native tongue and lived for several years in his home country while he did the exact same; he learned my native language and lived in my home country.

I have read your advice to others where you state that making one person your sole desire sets you up to have “without” feelings as you notice you are without that person. I have definitely seen this manifest in my situation. Although, it took a while to come to the realization that he cannot make me happy (that comes from within) and that constantly thinking thoughts of lack bring me more lack, I am grateful for the experience because it caused me to investigate who I am and taught me some things about love that I did not know before and made me grow as a person. However, I do, at times, still struggle with it.

He does love his wife and told me when we first met that he does not want to abandon her. I think he would feel it was irresponsible to leave her for me and I understand that. However, recently he wrote me saying that things were not perfect and that he wishes he could enjoy many of the things he has with her with me. Although, he maintains he still loves her and does not think that will change so much so that they are considering growing their family by having another child in the next few years.

I also read your advice saying that I cannot change another person’s reality by shifting my focus. This was new for me as I knew from reading the Secret that I could not change someone else’s life with my thoughts but your explanation of how we vibrate made it much clearer. I have been focusing on being with him without concern for when or how this might come to pass and I thought this was ok to focus on because it is my dream and I know, if it were possible, he would want it too. He has told me many times that if he were ever free again he’d spend the rest of his life with me. I just don’t think he sees it as a possibility considering the circumstances. When I told him I was divorcing (due to reasons independent of my relationship with him and with no hopes of being with him as a result of the divorce) he expressed worry that he may loose me to another once I was single and he was not.

I love him very much and I know he loves me very much without doubt. I want him to be happy, with or without me. My love for him is not dependent on if we can be together or not. Although, I would be exceedingly happy to be with him my happiness is not dependent on this, either. I know he cannot make me happy but rather he can share in the joy I already hold inside myself. I’ve read your advice on focusing on manifesting a romantic relationship rather than manifesting a specific person in your life and I truly don’t feel like I desire just a romantic relationship. I am an attractive woman and don’t have a difficult time attracting men. I am free to be with whomever I wish but I desire a romantic life of shared experiences with my soul mate in which I can share my joy with him.

What you said to other writers about not being able to change another person’s reality and how one should focus on a romantic relationship rather than a specific person and how the LOA will bring our vibrational match to us has left me with two questions.
First, the book the Secret said to make a list of who your perfect partner is and to be very specific. I understand their advice as I stated before that I attracted my 1st husband with very specific criteria but he only met those criteria and did not have other important qualities for life partners. I think by not being more specific on other important qualities I left those aspects up to the whims of the universe and the LOA brought me together with someone who met my criteria regardless of their other attributes. (i.e. The LOA made the easiest match it could find). However, if I stop imagining a life with my soul mate and just begin imagining a romantic relationship in general (not specific attributes of an ideal life partner) does this leave all the qualities of the “perfect partner” in that relationship up to the universe, as well?

Second, I have tried to make a list of who my perfect partner would be if I couldn’t be with my soul mate and basically I wrote a description of my soul mate without meaning to do so. I have tried to imagine this other person and I just don’t feel good about it. I know that if I don’t feel good I need to do something differently or I will attract more reasons to not feel good. Thinking about being with someone else just doesn’t seem right. I feel almost like I am being unfaithful to my soul mate by imagining a life with someone else when all I really want is to share the joys of life with him.

I am fearful (bad feeling to have, I know, but I am trying to change that feeling which is why I am writing you) that if my soul mate deep down wants to be with me and I begin to use the LOA to attract another romantic relationship and then commit myself to someone else at the same time his marriage fails on its own accord that we will just continue the pattern of being lovers whose ships have passed in the night.

After reading your advice on just attracting a romantic relationship I felt as though I was settling for something lesser than being with my soul mate. I wanted to know if it would be proper use of the LOA to continue to focus and feel joy for a life with my soul mate and end each visualization or affirmation with “or someone even better”? I ask this because any other attempt to imagine anything other than a life with my soul mate makes me feel either like I’m settling or apathetic. Whatever I visualize I want to feel excited about!!!! Since I have had these doubts about what I should actually be visualizing to change my reality I have not been able to visualize or focus on anything and I want to return to a state where I can feel excited about what I am focusing on rather than doubting if that focus is correct.

I am grateful to you for posting your responses to people’s questions for free online for others to read and I wish you much abundance for your graciousness.

Click here to post comments

Return to Law of Attraction Relationship Advice.

Use LOA To Attract The Perfect Person I’ve Already Met Reply

by John Peace

I know that you appreciate that you cannot make someone do or act in a certain way, and that there is no way to change your thoughts and feelings in order to change someone else’s experiences.

The power you have is the control of your own thoughts and emotions, and by choosing thoughts and emotions that represent your desires, you will then have the power over your own reality.

Happiness is not something that you create by attempting to mold your reality, it is a decision you make, and through choosing happiness in your thoughts and feelings, the representative happy reality must be brought to you.

It was Neville Goddard who said, “The world is a mirror, forever reflecting what you are doing, within yourself.” And nothing could be truer.

Do fear and confusion within yourself, and fear and confusion shall be reflected back to you in your experiences.

Do uncertainty and indecision within yourself, and uncertainty and indecision shall be reflected back to you in your experiences.

Do love and happiness within yourself, and love and happiness shall be reflected back to you in your experiences.

If it is the case that our experiences mirror our thoughts and emotions, then in no way can our thoughts and emotions depend upon a condition in our reality. That would defy Law and rob you of the creative power that you hold.

Love comes from within, and through holding the vibration of love within, the matching condition that helps you to maintain this vibration will be found in your experiences. And to search for a condition within your reality that makes you think and feel love, would simply mean that you are looking for love in the wrong place.

You have to choose!

Will you choose to live in love and happiness, trusting that the best and the most ideal match to the way you think and feel will be brought to your reality.

Or will you feel the lack of your desires and attempt to manipulate your reality, thinking that your happiness can only depend on certain things happening in your life experience.

By choosing your thoughts and emotions, you choose your destiny.

I know that you feel that he can be the only source for this perfect relationship, and from your perspective, it is perfectly understandable. But there is a much bigger picture here.

Yes when you are with him you feel the love and happiness that he helps you find within yourself, but this is still a state of being that you have, it is not something he gives you.

Try to own your emotion, and try to align yourself to the feeling that you have when you are with him. Do this, not to manipulate or change him, do it to help you to hold the vibration of your desires, and trust the process, as your reality becomes the mirror for what you have become within. Have faith, the best match to how you think and feel will always be found, it is Law.

So is there any need to be specific about what qualities you want in your perfect partner.

Well you are, you are holding a specific vibration, and the specific qualities that match that specific vibration will be found in the perfect match for how you think and feel.

But if you mean a specific physical quality, the wonderful thing about experience is that often, things are not what we expect, and sometimes things come to us from where we least expect them to, and simply by trusting the process, you know that the perfect match for the way you think and feel shall always be there.

The most important part of the process is how you feel, and for as long as you feel happy, and feel romantic, and feel love, the perfect match to this happy, romantic and loving way of being has to be found.

Let go and trust the process.

Happiness is a choice you make, it is not dependant on the conditions that make up your reality, in fact quite the opposite, your happiness creates these conditions, and if you wish to experience it…

Choose It.

If you would like a step-by-step guide to help you to change your focused thoughts and feelings, please use my Unlock The Power WorkBook

I hope that you have found this information useful, and if you have any thoughts, or if anyone has any thoughts, please join in and add a comment below…


John Peace

Finally... A Step-by-Step System
To Master The Law of Attraction
Click Here To Claim Your FREE Lessons

30-Days To Raise Your Vibration
The Unlock The Power WorkBook

P.S. Follow Me On FaceBook
CLICK HERE to join Our Law of Attraction Facebook Community

Use This Link If You Have A Law of Attraction Question

Click here to read or post comments

Return to Law of Attraction Relationship Advice.

Copyright 2007-2016

Members Log in

Promote Your Page Too

First Day Of The Rest Of Your Life